This is a post from your newest Mizzou fan, Mackey
Let me start this by getting this off my chest, I love Double Dave’s, a lot! That being said, I did sell my proverbial wang of collegiate fan hood for a large meat lover’s pizza and a dozen peproni rolls. And to be totally honest with you all, I really thought this contract would have had a warmer reception among my friends. Apparently, I’ve become a bigger sellout than Peyton Manning, and I don’t have a single tongue and cheek commercial with my slightly retarded brother! The only Sooner fan that I know of constantly reminds me of how gay I am for being a sellout. I’m sure that’s what he and his fellow Okla-Homo-Haters have heard all their lives; "Grown men who sell their football soul for pizza in the form of a contract are dying to tune a meat whistle." Honestly, I just wanted a college to root for. Mizzou seemed like a good bet. And every Mizzou fan that I know of (this consists entirely of Sleezy) is cool as hell. So where did I go wrong?
Nowhere, that’s where!
I’m a Fan! Probably more than most people I know. I know who Chase Daniel is, I know there’s this black guy on the team that’s faster than Eddie Van Halen on Meth, and there are a lot of fat guys down where the ball is snapped. Hell, at least I have a story to tell! Too many men my age pull for a Division One school that they have absolutely no ties too. No one gives a rat’s ass about what your dad or mom likes, or what you grew up watching. I grew up watching the Thundercats and Transformers, but I grew up. Grown men recognize a deal when they see one. I’m from nowhere really, but I love the Seattle Seahawks. Too many people think this makes me an automatic fan of Wazzu, and Udubb, but I really couldn’t care less. I’ve never been there, my dad’s not a Grad from there, no one in my whole family is really. The only tie I have to a college is the one I go to, and the Park Pirates have a football team that would get their land-hatin’ asses spanked by the South Central Louisiana State University Mud Dogs. That being said, I just wanted a good story to tell the kids when I’m hung-over.
“How’d you get to be a MIZZOU Fan old man?”
“I was bought fair and square! Now shut up and eat your cereal! MIZ!”
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Don’t Question my Fan-Hood
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8 comments:
That Eli picture is money. Also, the Oklahomo T-shirt pic is being saved for the B12 Title game post.
Also, 'meat-whistle' makes it's debut on Mizzourah. +1 for Mackey.
At least you have a better story instead of "I liked the Patriots because of 9/11". Weak shit.
We here at Mizzourah are not aginst those who love to tune meat whistles. Normally we like them to have boobs but hey, beggers can't be choosers. Welcome aboard.
I welcome you, although Double Dave's is still terrible pizza. You should have demanded two dozen pepperoni (to hell with how Double Dave's wants to spell them!) rolls and a philly cheesesteak stromboli.
M-I-Z! Mackey. Let me hear you now.
when I'm drunk (like every night), i microwave Jack's pizza. Jack rocks.
Double Daves is good, but you all know Sleeze, he could have bought me for a bag of peanuts. He's that good of a salesmen and you all know it!
Sold your fanhood for a large meat lover's huh? I always knew you were a meat lover!
I thought we established that I was bought by MIZZOU, not Okla-Homo
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